Sex is not a competition, although with all fuss it can sometimes feel like it. It is not a race. There are no prizes for being the first and no penalties for coming last (sometimes cumming last can be a good thing!).
Once puberty hits it is natural for the majority of young people to be fascinated by sex and to gossip and joke about it –
However, One of the first facts you should realise about sex is that people are not always truthful when they talk about it!
Just because your mate comes in to school and tells you they’ve slept with four people who all think they are a sex god, does not necessarily make it so.
There is an old adage: Those who shout about it aren’t getting any – it’s the quiet ones you have to watch. It might be worth bearing this in mind when you’re next talking sex with your mates.
The most accurate statistics we have around the age people first have sex reckon that the majority of people lose their virginity when they are just over 16 yrs old. This hasn’t changed really since your parents were losing their virginity too.
The point is – it doesn’t matter what anyone else says or what you read in the papers or hear on the TV. Having sex for the first time, or the fiftieth time is a choice for you to make alone. Just because you think everyone else is doing it does not mean that they are or that this means you should be too. It is your decision; your choice. No one else can tell you, you’re ready.
So how do you know if you are ready to have sex?
We’ll come to that in the next section , however, the first question you need to ask yourself is what does having sex mean to you?
© Going off the Rails 2012. Adapted from ‘Playing Downstairs’ by Jonny Hunt